Archive | March, 2009

[Hockey] God-Awful (Backup) Goaltending: It’s Called Bruins.

29 Mar

This just in: a clinical study has determined that there is little appreciable difference between Manny Fernandez and an open net. One need look no further than tonight’s 7-5 win over The Leafs, a game that most assuredly would have gone into the books as a loss if not for the simple fact that the Bruins were fortunate enough to be facing rookie Toronto goalie Justin Pogge, who got this deer-in-the-headlights look about him every time a puck approached.

Fernandez, who by the way is making more than FOUR TIMES the amount of money that Tim Thomas is this season, has proven himself an expensive liability. Tim Thomas got a lot of flack in the national sports media for allowing that incredibly long game-deciding goal in a 4-3 loss to the Capitals last month, which was unfortunate because Thomas ended up being pigeonholed as an incompetent goaltender who had made an error so egregious that he could never possibly live it down, while Fernandez’s frequent inadequacy in the crease was left out of the discussion.

When Jack Edwards exclaims “SAVE BY THOMAS!” it’s said with conviction and certainty, as if that’s what he was expecting, while when he yells “SAVE BY FERNANDEZ!?” there’s more than a hint of surprise contained within the words, as if he was expecting a goal. He’s got damn little confidence in the man, and I can’t say I blame him.


[Odds and Ends] Unsolicited Career Counseling

19 Mar

Yesterday I was at work helping a client with her computer, when out of the blue she remarked that I had a future in medicine. “Why is that?” I wondered. Because I’m ever-so-sharply dressed? Because of my flawless use of incomprehensible technical jargon?

“No. Because your handwriting is just awful.”

It’s cool, malpractice insurance is kind of steep anyways.

[Video] Epic Fail and Epic Acting

2 Mar

So in my infinite feeble-mindedness I managed to forget to bring the power cable for my laptop home for spring break. Unfortunately I didn’t realize this until I had drained about 80% of the battery. I don’t know anyone else in my town that has a MacBook. Sounds like fodder for something to post on fmylife, eh?

So, I’m typing this up on the ol’ Wal-Mart bought POS home computer. Due to my technological limitations, it seems likely that I won’t be posting nearly as often as I had wanted to over break. Oh well, such is life. I’m trying to convince myself that doing without the laptop for a week and a half will give needed perspective to my existence. Of course, I don’t actually believe that, but keeping myself half-convinced of its truthiness helps to dull the pain (well, that and the tequila).

But enough of my technologically-induced moping. I do have something good to report. Something very good indeed, courtesy of Eric Wilbur over at Let’s just say that Dustin Pedroia appears to have been working on his acting chops when he wasn’t working out at API, and that the results are hillarious…